Broken Desires
by normaljean
Summary: The war is over and Hermione finds herself adrift is a sea of Weasleys. Will she give in to the broken desires that have pledged her heart for so long? Or will she run from what could be the greatest love of all? HermioneGinny slash


Disclaimer: I ain't she. Though I am certain she would be properly horrified to know the direction I am taking her two young, innocent girls.  
  
This is slash folks don't read it if you don't like it.  
  
Hermione Granger sighed and rested her head against the window of the train carriage that she was in. She watched as bellowing puffs of smoke and steam rose up from under the train, and obscured the view of the platform, and the tiny town of Hogsmead. The smoke reminded her of muggle flying, and the way it looked when a plane would pass through a marshmallow like cloud. She sighed again. She didn't much mind that the last view of the place she had spent the last seven years of her life was beyond her. She didn't really care to see the destruction that took place in the wake of Graduation.  
  
Graduation was over. Commencement had started a one-day war that had turned student against student, and made heroes out of valedictorians.  
  
So much had happened in such a short space of time. It was hard to digest that the last few days would change the face of the wizarding world forever, or at least until the next dark wizard rose up to shake its foundations again.  
  
The carriage she was in was slowly filling to capacity as every Gryffindor on the train seemed to want to pile in with 'The Trio'. When the benches had filled, the floor became the next best thing. Poor Ginny Weasley had found herself wedged between Hermione's legs on the floor, but at least seem glad to have found the spot.  
  
She glanced down at the long, red hair that filled the space between her thighs. Ginny had embraced her leg almost immediately, and now had her head resting on Hermione's knee. The gesture was child-like in its innocence, but had Hermione thinking very adult things. She pushed those thoughts down, as she always did where Ginny was concerned. Instead, she tried to think of Ginny's predicament. There would be no seventh year for her. At least, not at Hogwarts. Ginny would survive it though because that what she did best. Like Harry, Ginny was exceptional at beating the odds. They made a formidable pair. So formidable that even Lord Voldemort couldn't bring them down. In the end, she had made it possible for Harry to fulfill his destiny. For that, Hermione was grateful.  
  
Harry caught her eyes, and held her in his weary gaze. He smiled a tired but knowing smile as he glanced in Ginny's direction.  
  
She smirked with a slight flush, and tried to pull away from his knowing stare, but he wouldn't let her. He crooked a finger, and beckoned her to lean forward. They met somewhere in the middle of the space between them.  
  
"I have a surprise for you when we get home," he whispered softly against her ear. For some reason his cryptic words only deepened her flush. Unfortunately, not for any of the right reasons a boy would make a girl flush. Her and Harry were two of a kind though, so at least their relationship couldn't harbor unwanted crushes.  
  
She raised a quizzical eyebrow at him in response.  
  
"Don't worry, it's a good thing," he replied to her unasked question, and gave her a quick peck on the cheek.  
  
She could stand some good right about now.  
  
The train made a sudden lurch forward that tossed about all that had gathered to bask in the presence of 'The Boy Who Lived'. A nervous twitter made its way around the car, but once the ride smoothed out, a reserved silence settled in.  
  
She took the opportunity to observe some of her classmates. She knew that some would likely never cross her path again, and then she could hardly see living without others.  
  
Her eyes lighted on the two young men that sat directly in front of her.  
  
Harry and Ron.  
  
She focused on Harry, and a small, sad, smile played across her lips. He was already asleep. She didn't begrudge the fact that he would probably sleep all the way back to London. He needed the rest and he had certainly earned it. It didn't stop the hoard of classmates that had squeezed into their compartment from admiring him though. Poor Harry. Would the world they lived in ever leave him alone? Probably not, he had done the impossible a few too many times for people to forget him. For now though, he seemed contentedly oblivious to the admiration of those around him. She smiled again and prayed for him to have a normal life someday.  
  
Her eyes traveled to the young man next to Harry.  
  
Ron sat ramrod straight, his features tight and pensive. He was on guard, as he always was where Harry was concerned. The last few months had taken a toll on Ron, as it had everyone connected to Harry, but Ron in particular. He had become Harry's unofficial bodyguard.  
  
He glanced up and met Hermione's gaze with a tight smile. It said so much. Things only a few could understand. She understood though, and returned her own softer version of it. Like Ron, she would have given her life for the boy-man that slept with his head rested against his best friend's shoulder. Ron nearly had.  
  
He allowed himself to relax a bit and rested his head against Harry's before giving into the luxury of closing his own eyes.  
  
The scene touched her so deeply that she could not help the errant tear that slipped down her cheek.  
  
Neville Longbottom caught her eyes as she looked away, and gave her a drained, but triumphant grin. Neville had come into his own when the final battle occurred. He was no longer the timid boy of seven years ago. He was a man, and a good one at that. He proved that, not that Hermione ever doubted he would. She was so proud of him, and she told him so with her most brilliant smile. He blushed at this, but managed to give her a little wink anyway. If the girl plastered to his side noticed the exchange she chose to ignore it in good grace.  
  
Luna Lovegood knew where her man's heart lay. Not that the girl would ever consider Hermione a threat. As odd as it seemed, Luna had been the only other person perceptive enough to see where Hermione's true passions rested. The fact that she never told anyone gave her a special place in Hermione's heart.  
  
Luna tossed her a significant smirk, and glanced in Ginny's direction. Her smile broadened when she looked back to Hermione and noticed the deep flush that tented her features.  
  
Hermione turned away, and rested her head against the window once again. Her mind was suddenly too muddled to think about anymore of her fellow classmates, except of course, the girl innocently nestled between her legs.  
  
It was going to be a long trip home.  
  
***********  
  
Kings Cross Platform 9 and 3/4  
  
She stepped off the train, and was immediately thrust into a sea of black robes. It was a sea that ebbed and flowed, like all seas do, to the rhythm of coming home. Caught in the current of the student body, she rushed the shore of waiting parents with them. They broke in waves all around her to warm embraces and frantic, motherly kisses.  
  
"I'm so glad you're alive," rang out in small choruses all over the crowded platform.  
  
She felt oddly detached from the scene. More like a surfer riding the waves of her classmates to the spot where her part of the shore used to be. It was now a void. A blinding nothingness that waited for her arrival only to throw her into the harsh world of adulthood alone.  
  
Technically, she had no place to go. Her home, like her parents, reduced to a few broken pieces that would never be again. Of course Molly Weasley had insisted that she stay with them until she felt ready to move on. The loss of her parents and the sudden beginning and ending of the strange battle that had cost Voldemort his life had left her feeling strangely unconnected to anyone or anything. Would clinging to the Weasleys for a few more months really make it any better?  
  
Someone suddenly grabbed her, pulling her away from her thoughts and the barrier at the same time. She whirled around, pulling her wand from her robes at the same time. She had just enough time to process it was Harry that had her before firing off some random curse.  
  
"Geeze Hermione, paranoid much?" he asked, though he was clearly amused by her reaction.  
  
Her cheeks flushed, and she realized that the way Harry was holding her, they looked like they were about to Waltz.  
  
"Sorry Harry," she replied sheepishly, and pulled herself away from him. "I guess hard habits die slow."  
  
Harry's amusement died rapidly.  
  
"I'm sorry too, I didn't think..."  
  
She waved off the endless apology he was about to deliver.  
  
"Don't. It's not important. Anyway, what are the plans?" she asked. Somehow, Harry was the only person with whom she could see going through this process with.  
  
"Remember when I told you I had a surprise?" He took her hand firmly in his own, and drew his wand. She had only a moment to realize what was happening before she heard the loud pop that signaled their departure.  
  
The Burrow Or Somewhere Close By  
  
She opened her eyes when she felt the ground become solid under her feet a few seconds later. She found herself at the top of a hill, and the Burrow silhouetted against a purple, orange sky. The house was the oddest feature in the setting, and she took a moment to marvel at the way it defied gravity in certain places.  
  
She wondered why Harry had apparated so far away. The Burrow was at least a kilometer away from where they were now.  
  
"Why are we here?" she asked. The place was pretty deserted except for, Two Track Lane, the road that led to the Weasley home.  
  
Harry's smile faded, and he looked to Hermione's right significantly.  
  
"Oh wait, I forgot you can't see it," he said with a blush.  
  
He pointed his wand and muttered something she couldn't quite hear. A moment later, where there had been only woods, stood a house. A grand house that was every bit as big as the Burrow, and only slightly less askew.  
  
It also looked empty.  
  
"What is this Harry?"  
  
"Our new home, that is, if you want to live here." He gave her a hopeful look that, had she been different, would have stolen her heart.  
  
"Harry... No way," she said as a slow grin spread across her face.  
  
"At least we know the neighbors," he replied, smiling widely.  
  
She turned to face him fully, and threw herself into his arms.  
  
"Is that a yes then?" he asked as the front of his robes became wet with her tears.  
  
She nodded her head against his chest. "Yes Harry... yes."  
  
The Actual Burrow  
  
The only things about the Burrow that seemed to change was the number of Weasleys that occupied it at any given time, and the smells that wafted to the main road that ranged from ghastly to wonderful. Tonight, it was the latter, and the house was at full occupancy. Every Weasley was present, including a few that had managed to seep in while nobody was looking.  
  
Celebration was the agenda for the evening. All the Weasleys had survived the battle that had taken Voldemort's life. It was indeed a small miracle that any of them had lived considering the rather caviler attitude that seemed to run rampant in the Weasley genes. But the food was good, and the liquor was strong, and it didn't take a genius like Hermione to see where this would go.  
  
Author Weasley cleared his throat in an effort to catch the attention of the young people in the room.  
  
"All right children. Your mother and I are going to bed. Please don't burn down the house," he replied merrily.  
  
"But Author..." Molly began to protest, but he cut her off with a hurried whisper in her ear, and a brief, but passionate kiss that left their children gagging in horror.  
  
Hermione had smiled at the scene, but turned melancholy quickly. She wiped away an unchecked tear that shed in memory of her own parents, and how she would never see their own sloppy displays of affection again.  
  
Ginny caught sight of this, and quietly pulled Hermione away from the crowd, through the kitchen, and out the back door.  
  
Once outside, Ginny pulled Hermione into a tight embrace. The action dissolved what little control the older girl had, and before she knew it she was openly crying against Ginny's shoulder. It was the first time Hermione had allowed herself to grieve over her parents openly.  
  
"That's it. Just let it go," Ginny whispered softly into her friend's hair. "It's ok to miss them."  
  
Hermione squeezed the taller girl more tightly as a fresh wave of hurt washed through her. She didn't want to let go. She didn't want to leave the comfort of Ginny's strong arms ever.  
  
"Oh Ginny. Why wasn't I there? Why didn't I see that they were targets? Why didn't I stop this from happening?"  
  
Ginny kissed the top of her head and stroked feather like touches down her back.  
  
"There was no way you could have known Hermione, and if you had been there... well you would be dead too, and I... I know I couldn't have..." Ginny choked on her own words. She didn't want to think about a world that didn't have Hermione Granger in it.  
  
Hermione sniffled a little, and pulled away from Ginny's embrace enough to look her friend in the eyes. For the first time ever she considered the effect she could have on another person.  
  
"You couldn't have what?" she asked softly.  
  
Ginny smiled. "It doesn't matter. You're here, and you're alive, and you parents would have wanted you that way. I can only imagine what you must be feeling. I know I would be freaking if mum and dad..." she trailed off, and pulled Hermione back into another tight hug.  
  
"God, I can't imagine what you must be feeling at all," she added softly.  
  
Hermione's tears had been spent, but she allowed herself the comfort of Ginny's reassuring embrace for a moment longer.  
  
She pulled herself away completely.  
  
"Look at us," she with a wry grin. "This is supposed to be a party not a wake."  
  
Ginny grinned back.  
  
"You are correct as always Ms. Granger. Shall we?" Ginny held her arm out for Hermione to take, and the older girl did.  
  
Ginny stopped just inside the kitchen, effectively stopping Hermione as well.  
  
Hermione gave her a questioning glance.  
  
"Let's not go back in there," Ginny said, jutting her chin towards the living room, and the rest of the family.  
  
Hermione's stomach did a strange twist. "Why not?"  
  
"Because silly, this is our last chance to spend some quality girl time together, what with you and Harry moving out tomorrow."  
  
It was probably true, but the idea of it still made Hermione more than a little uncomfortable.  
  
"Gin, you know you'll always be..."  
  
Ginny cut her off. "Yeah I know, but it won't be the same now will it? You and Harry will get jobs, and Ron will always be there, and well... I won't have your undivided attention."  
  
Little did Ginny know...  
  
"Alright Gin," Hermione agreed.  
  
**********  
  
The girls sat cross-legged on Ginny's bed facing one another. Peels of laughter gripped Ginny as she rolled slightly to her left.  
  
"No way!" Ginny shouted as she struggled for air between giggles.  
  
Hermione just smiled at her.  
  
"I swear it's true," she replied as she took another swig from the bottle that Ginny had pinched from the kitchen earlier.  
  
"Dean and Seamus?" Ginny had to clarify this point.  
  
"Well to be fair, they were quite drunk, and well, Harry did dare them," Hermione said wryly, and handed the bottle back to Ginny.  
  
The younger girl took the bottle, but had to steady herself before taking another healthy swallow.  
  
"Well then... I suppose you have told me Dean and Seamus' most embarrassing moment, but I don't see how that could possibly be considered yours as well," Ginny said pushing the bottle back to Hermione.  
  
"Well ... I was embarrassed for them. Doesn't that count?"  
  
Ginny wagged a finger at her.  
  
"I think not. Besides, I bet I already know what it is."  
  
Hermione doubted it seriously. Besides, didn't you have to be caught in the moment for it to be truly embarrassing?  
  
"Oh really?" Hermione asked, though her mouth suddenly went dry. She took another pull from the bottle to wet her palette.  
  
"Uh huh. I overheard Ron tell Harry about something that happened, but I suppose it could have been just a rumor, or wishful thinking," Ginny replied.  
  
Hermione swallowed reflexively. "And what was that pray tell?" she asked, though she suddenly felt like she really didn't want to know.  
  
Ginny moved closer in a conspiratorial fashion, and suddenly became quite serious. She took the bottle from Hermione and placed it on the floor beside the bed.  
  
"Now listen Hermione, what I am about to ask you will have no bearing whatsoever on our friendship, one way or the other."  
  
Hermione nodded but already didn't like what her friend was about to say.  
  
"And this never went further that Harry and Ron, and me of course," Ginny paused, and gauged Hermione's reaction before pressing on. She had the feeling that somehow, Hermione already knew where this was going. "Ron told Harry that he saw you kiss Luna Lovegood." She said the words in a rush, but could tell by Hermione's flush that she understood every word, and, that it was true.  
  
Still, she wanted to hear it from Hermione.  
  
"We um. That is I... we..." Hermione faltered in her would-be confession. Somehow, she knew this was what Ginny was going to ask her. She glanced up at Ginny desperately, wishing that the girl would rescue her from the truth of it.  
  
Hermione's reaction sobered Ginny considerable. She knew her friend well enough to know that this was not an easy thing for her to admit to. However, she was still peeved enough over the fact that Hermione had never told her directly that she allowed her friend to flounder for a moment.  
  
"Merlin," Ginny whispered in a quiet awe. "You kissed Looney Luna? Why on earth would you do such a thing Hermione?"  
  
Hermione was suddenly pushed back to seven months ago, when her feelings for Ginny had reached a crescendo. She was in a constant state of want and desire, and she had barely ever kissed, anyone.  
  
"Ginny, you have to understand..."  
  
Ginny cut her off for the second time that night.  
  
"Hermione, I thought I was your best friend. Why wouldn't you tell me? Do you have any idea how awful it was to overhear Ron tell Harry that? Nobody would even bother to tell me directly." Ginny drew in an exaggerated sigh. "I really wish you people would stop treating me like I'm twelve."  
  
"I'm sorry Gin, truly," Hermione said softly as she reached for Ginny's arm. Ginny pulled away before she could make the contact though.  
  
"Just tell me this," she took a steadying breath. "Were you in love with her?"  
  
The absurdity of the question caused an indignant snort of laughter to escape Hermione. But one look in Ginny's eyes made it clear she was serious.  
  
"Of course not," she replied.  
  
Ginny digested this for a moment.  
  
"Were you just... curious?"  
  
This was the hard part. How was Hermione supposed to give Ginny a reasonable answer and not let on to the feelings she harbored.  
  
"I suppose that was part of it," she answered vaguely.  
  
Ginny bit her lip, but pressed on. "You could have come to me you know."  
  
"It wasn't that simple Gin," Hermione whispered softly. She looked away from Ginny's intense blue eyes. Nothing was ever simple where Ginny was concerned.  
  
"Why not?" the younger girl asked, but somehow she knew the answer to that question as well.  
  
Hermione sighed deeply.  
  
"Because... I ... It just... wasn't." Hermione turned herself away from her friend. She didn't want to do this. Not now, or ever. She pulled herself into a tight ball of knees and elbows, and buried her face into her legs.  
  
She felt the bed shifting beside her, and Ginny's hands on her arms. She didn't want Ginny to touch her, and tried to shake her off. Her friend was stronger though, and had other things in mind.  
  
Ginny pulled at Hermione until she was uncurled.  
  
"I think not Ms Granger," she said through gritted teeth as she struggled to keep Hermione from coiling up again.  
  
She pushed Hermione back until the other girl was flat beneath her. A wicked thought crossed her mind briefly, but she pushed it aside for a moment.  
  
"I want to have this out now. Something is obviously bothering you, and it obviously evolves me," Ginny said, as she stretched out to further pin Hermione to the bed.  
  
"Ginny don't, please," Hermione begged as she struggled against Ginny's body.  
  
Ginny pushed harder grinding herself more intimately against the girl beneath her. It hadn't been intentional, but it had quite an effect.  
  
Hermione gasped lightly. Ginny noticed it.  
  
"Talk to me then," Ginny replied, her tone eerily clam. She pushed against Hermione again. "Tell me what you want."  
  
Hermione bit down on the moan that threatened to escape her. She had to wonder if Ginny knew what she was doing.  
  
"I want you to get off of me," she replied, and made a more concentrated effort to struggle against the other girl.  
  
"Do you really?" Ginny glanced down at Hermione, searching for signs that the girl might be sincere. The older girl's erect nipples told a very different story however. "Are you sure about that?"  
  
Hermione stopped struggling, and followed Ginny's gaze. She felt an involuntary flush at her body's contradictions to her words. Had she aroused suspicion in Ginny? The answer to that was clear. And in doing so, Hermione had simple become... aroused.  
  
"Ginny please," she hissed softly, but lost the context to what she was begging for when the girl pressed against her more deliberately than before.  
  
"Please what?" Ginny asked with breathy indulgence.  
  
Hermione's desire slowly began to replace her fear of discovery. She became bolder.  
  
"If you're going to do something, then do it," Hermione replied, her tone steady, and her face suddenly unreadable.  
  
It was Ginny's turn to falter and blush. Now that she had Hermione where she wanted her, what was she to do with her?  
  
Hermione took advantage of Ginny's sudden indecision, and flipped their positions. Despite being smaller, and obviously the weaker of the two, Hermione found herself in the agreeable situation of having the upper hand.  
  
Ginny became indignant and huffy. "Well, what are YOU going to do now?" she asked.  
  
A thousand ideas rallied in Hermione's mind.  
  
"I'm going to attempt to make you see reason. You have no idea of the situation you almost got yourself into a moment ago, and I'll be damned if I'm going put you further into it."  
  
Ginny grinned viciously.  
  
"You're a coward Hermione Granger. Plain and simple. Or a fool. What makes you think I wasn't aware of what was going on, and that I wasn't prepared for what was coming next."  
  
Hermione bristled at the idea, but decided to make a point.  
  
"Is that so? Well then, tell me Virginia Weasley, what do you make of this."  
  
And with that, Hermione Granger kissed Virginia Weasley soundly on the mouth.  
  
She pulled away from Ginny a moment later, her breathing frantic and heavy. She was certain Ginny hadn't been expecting it, but when she looked down, Ginny was grinning madly.  
  
"Is that the best you can do?" Ginny asked, her tone as cheeky as her smile. "Is that what Luna taught you?"  
  
That wasn't supposed to be the point. Ginny was supposed to be floored, and abashed by Hermione's inappropriate action, not questioning her abilities for kissing.  
  
"Hardly," Hermione replied dryly.  
  
Suddenly, Ginny was sitting up, causally pushing away Hermione's clumsy attempts at keeping her down. She wrapped her arms around Hermione's waist, and held the older girl tightly in her lap.  
  
"Prove it then," she said her tone taking on a quality that made Hermione's heart race. She trailed her lips lightly along Hermione's jaw- line.  
  
Hermione sucked in a harsh breath. She had reached the end of her very long tether. If the girl wanted a kiss, then by god she would kiss her.  
  
"Ginny," she whispered softly.  
  
Ginny stopped what she was doing, and met Hermione's deep brown eyes.  
  
Hermione chewed her bottom lip reflectively. She had wanted this for so long. Had desperately wanted to be in this very situation, and she was here, and still she was hesitant.  
  
She raised her hands to Ginny's cheeks and stroked them gently. She could feel the heat that burned the younger girl's skin there. Was she as nervous as Hermione was?  
  
"What are you waiting for?" Ginny asked breathlessly. She could barely stand the anticipation; and the look in Hermione's eyes was positively undoing her.  
  
"I want you to understand something, this isn't like when I kissed Luna."  
  
Ginny was about to interrupt her again, but she quieted the other girl with a light finger on her lips.  
  
"Listen to me now, this is important. Luna didn't mean anything to me, nor did that kiss a moment ago. But I want you to know Ginny Weasley that I love you more than words can properly express, and if I ... If I kiss you now that will be the reason why."  
  
Ginny's lips parted slightly at Hermione's words as she realized that she may not have properly gauged the extent of her friend's feelings. It was frightening and thrilling all at the same time.  
  
"Is that what you want?" Hermione asked, the look on Ginny's face giving her pause.  
  
Ginny nodded yes, not trusting her voice to say the right thing. She had pushed Hermione to this point, and she didn't want to give her any reason to back out now.  
  
Hermione nodded too, then tilted her head slightly before allowing her lips to touch Ginny's fleetingly. She readjusted herself, and wrapped her legs around Ginny's waist, pulling their bodies closer together. She stroked Ginny's cheeks with light fingertips, before pushing her hands through the girl's silky, smooth, hair. She traced Ginny's lips gently with her own, her movements achingly slow and deliberate. She could feel Ginny's heart beating rapidly, as rapidly as her own, and she pulled back just enough to see the look on Ginny's face. What she saw erased all doubt in her mind, and she crushed her mouth against Ginny's with a passion that was consuming. Her tongue pushed past soft lips to fill the other girl completely.  
  
All Ginny could do was hold on for dear life as she felt all of Hermione's desires pour into her. She briefly regretted having misjudged the other girl's abilities, but only because she had been so wrong. She had wanted this too, from the moment she had heard of Hermione's tryst with Luna, she had wanted it. She hoped and prayed that Hermione would come to her a confess a secret love, and kiss her like this. She had wanted it, she realized, even before she knew she wanted it. She could stay like this forever. She could...  
  
There was a loud bang, followed by a series of only slightly less loud bangs.  
  
"Oy, open up Gin!" Ron shouted through her bedroom door.  
  
The girls parted with enough force for there to be an audible pop when there lips parted. Hermione pushed herself away from Ginny so hard that the girl fell backwards against the bed.  
  
"Maybe their asleep Ron," Harry said, though only slightly less loud than Ron had been.  
  
"Nah, there's light coming from under the door mate," Ron replied.  
  
Hermione was the first to recover, and made her way to the door before the boys could start banging on it again. She glanced back a Ginny, who was struggling to sit back up.  
  
Ginny nodded once she had recovered herself, and Hermione opened the door to revel a very drunk Ron, and a slightly embarrassed Harry.  
  
"Sorry," Harry mouthed to her, as he took in her appearance. She was flushed and wild eyed, and her lips where puffy red.  
  
"What do you two want?" she asked, trying not to sound put out by the interruption.  
  
Harry grinned at her.  
  
"We just wanted to spend some time with you guys," Ron replied, his words as sloppy as his smile. 


End file.
